The StLGF is a non-profit, non-sexual, social and educational organization open to all adults who believe in freedom of gender expression. Although our members are primarily male-to female crossdressers and male-to-female transsexuals; all members of the transgendered community, as well as supportive family members and interested professionals.

"The Gazette" is published bi-monthly in January, March, May, July, September, and November. The deadline for submissions is the 15th of the month prior to publication. For information please use our voice mail number (314) 607-4163.

All submissions become the property of StLGF, and should be accompanied by a release-to-print statement. Letters, articles, and/or pictures that include nudity, profanity, or obscenities will not be published.

We also reserve the right not to publish any other materials that we consider inappropriate. All issues are copyrighted. However, any nonprofit organization or publication may reprint articles or other information from this publication, provided they allow the free use of their materials by other non-profit organizations.

If you have any questions please write:
StLGF,
PO Box, St. Louis, MO 63117,
or call us at
(314) 607-4163
Email the StLGF: stlgftg@netscape.net
Web Sites:
http://members.aol.com/stlgf1/

Email the Editor: Christy Kay: Christy Kay

The Presidents Column

by Carman M.

Huge Turn-Out.... Did you know we had forty eight people attend our January meeting to hear Dr. Helen Friedmann speak? I believe this is the largest attendance figure we have had in my two years of being a St. Louis Gender Foundation member. I am very happy it occurred the night Helen came to speak with us. I can't think of any better way for us to show our appreciation for Helen and all she has done for so many of our members and transgendered people everywhere. I'm very glad Helen shared her evening, thoughts, and feelings with us. It was a wonderful evening.

Survey Says.... Thirty surveys were filled out and returned at the January meeting. For the most part, the survey responses were positive. 90% of the survey responses said StLGF was fulfilling a need and that the current StLGF Board is doing a good job. 70% of the survey responses indicated satisfaction with planned activities and outings. Our lowest marks (67%) came in the area of whether basic social and educational needs were being met. Thank you all for participating in the survey. As a result of your surveys, the StLGF board will work to provide more outings and additional educational information for our members.

Shopping Anyone?.... Sharon has organized an event you won't want to miss. A shopping night at Grand Wig (307 N.. Theresa near the Fox Theater, phone 314-533-6699). We have been invited to shop from 5:00 PM until closing on Saturday March 28th. Immediately after shopping, arrangements are being made for a dinner/show at Alibi's. If you are interested in shopping at Grand Wig and the dinner/show at Alibi's, Please call the St. Louis Gender Foundation voice mailbox (phone 314-367-4128) and leave a message.

Elections... It's hard to believe, but here it is March already and our St. Louis Gender Foundation elections are just around the corner. Can a year really go by this fast? As Jamie announced at our February meeting, I will not be running for a second term as StLGF President when elections are held in April. I am stepping down for personal reasons. This has been an extremely difficult year for me emotionally. I know running for a second term right now would not be what is best for me. St. Louis Gender Foundation has been the most important organization to which I have ever belonged. Literally, it helped me understand and deal with my crossdressing, the most confusing and biggest concern in my life. All of us have been helped by the St. Louis Gender Foundation, and we must consider how we can give something back to our organization. Serving as an StLGF Board member is a wonderful way to do this. If you have good leadership skills, good organizational skills, and can volunteer a few hours of your time each month, then please consider running for the StLGF Board. Our organization, its current members, and its future members need you.

The Continuing Adventures of Marci

By Marcia Lynn Williams

Girlfriends, two months really went by quickly! So many adventures have occurred my head is swimming. Our January session was very well attended. Meeting Helen Friedman was so very meaningful for me and Ms. Babs. Moreover, watching so many members interact with her, asking questions and providing insightful comments gave me thrills of delight!! I think she had a most positive effect on our membership.

The following week we visited with Judy Lynn Johnson. She invited us, our VP Ms. Love, and Diane & Ms. Patty to a wonderful evening of dinner and lively conversation. Judy went the extra mile by having a very lovely table set with place names and everything. During the evening she helped Diane come to a better awareness of her femme potential by letting her try on several sexy outfits! Diane was floating on a cloud. We took photos and some video. It's always wonderful to get together with sisters in their homes. Babs and I have had many such occasions in our home and have attended other's homes. Never would I have ever dreamed that I'd ever get all dressed up and go to other's homes and/or have them over to our humble domicile playing dress up like in the days of our youth!!

The month of February always brings another anniversary of wedded bliss between Babs and me. This particular year we celebrated our 30th!! We went to Branson (of course, I had grown a goatee and wore a cowboy hat because Babs had married my dude side), rented a luxury suite, had a prime rib dinner, had champagne in our room...just the two of us...and then went to the night club for drinks and dancing. We were in the Valentine's Day spotlight dance as the anniversary couple!! The following day we got together with a close couple who lived near the resort town. They took us to one of the nicest little towns we'd ever seen...Eureka Springs, Arkansas. It's called "Little Switzerland" and is about the most beautiful resort area one could imagine. We plan to return there soon. By the way. The genetic woman part of this couple is transgendered...she always has felt more masculine than feminine...and can relate to my crossdressing needs in a special way.

Another interesting and rewarding experience for me has been having photos published in a very high class TG magazine called "LadyLike" published by Creative Design Services. A number of you are familiar with it and some of you know the publisher, JoAnn Roberts. Anyway, as a result of my pics being in issues #31 and #32, I've been inundated with lots of e-mail as well as snail mail from cross dressers all over the country and even from Mexico!! Oh, I guess I ought to include two letters from fellows who want to date me!?? I'm flattered, but...no thanks. I'm taken.

Yours truly was interviewed en femme recently. A certain StLGF Secretary, Ms. Christine, invited me to meet Andrea from Little Rock, Arkansas. She is a very nice genetic female who is putting together a presentation to be shown all over the country. It will include video interviews of those of us in the TG community as well as still photos and any prose or poetry we might care to submit. The interview was such a thrill!! I just laid it all out knowing that many, many folks from all over these wonderful United States of America...land of the free...would get to see and hear from someone who has come to accept herself as very, very feminine. I've had lots of help from all of you in our club. I truly appreciate that very much. Thanks, dear Sisters.

Self acceptance. That's a very deep and meaningful concept, isn't it? Sadly, I received some news recently that hurt deeply, and saddened me to the point of tears. A cross dressing sister has decided to do a purge!?? For any of you who don't know what a purge is, it's the process of getting rid of every feminine item and reverting to one's masculine side, going back into that bad old dark closet. Ouch!! For some, this process happens over and over. For a time we just love our femme side. But then, for any number of reasons, we begin to question what we are doing. In this particular person's case, she and her S/O have both run from themselves. Oh, how this hurts me. You see, because of my very first article for this wonderful publication, my friend came to a meeting and shared her story of how much like me she felt after reading my story. Sniff...please pardon me while I grab a tissue and dry my eyes...

She got to know many of us as did her S/O. Both seemed so happy and free. But, I sensed that something just wasn't quite right in their relationship to each other. Facades were presented. Promises were made but never kept. Eventually, the two of them have apparently moved to separate parts of their house, and our cross dressing sister reverted back to "total macho" big time??? Now, please understand. I hold no condemnation for this. Rather, I see it as a necessary part of their growth at this point in their lives. Moreover, in my humble opinion, I think that the S/O is having just as much difficulty accepting herself as is her TG mate. Maybe some of you can relate to this. Maybe you have a spouse or lover or friend or family member who has decided not to accept you as your total self. And maybe you can sense that they are having difficulty accepting themselves, yet cover this up with a false front of pseudo-confidence. Oh well...

Enough of the sad news. Now, on with the show...

...and speaking of shows, our annual Follies were awe some! I mean, AWESOME!!!!! Moreover, we had a number of celebrities who showed up at Ernie's Class Act on the City's South Side. There was Lauren Bacall who did a number from a Broadway musical. Deana Carter kept asking that all important girl question, "Did I shave my legs for this??" And Sonny & Cher did their classic "I Got You Babe". Helen Reddy kept telling a bother some male to "Leave Me Alone, Just Leave Me Alone..." We had a really great audience, many of whom had celebrated our City's Mardi Gras. They were generous in attention, applause, and contributions to this special fund raiser. It was fun, fun, fun!! Special thanks to Shannon who worked so hard putting it all together. Also, thanks to a certain Russell who came through like a real trouper, even though he had a 101 degree temperature. Very special thanks to Ms. Babs who gave of her time to do video work. Splendid job, Sweetheart. And thanks to everyone else who participated or did support work.

One of the really nice things about performing in and/or attending a show such as our annual Follies is that we are truly "out"!! We are all dressed up en femme in front of a segment of society. We must interact with others besides our own TG group. For instance, we either must use the ladies room...or torture ourselves by waiting until we get home?? Well, I opt for the ladies room. Suppose some customer in the establishment asks us a question? Maybe they'd like to know something about which performer is on stage, or maybe ask about our Gender Club? We can either engage in conversation with them or look pretty silly just staring back at them?? My point is, most folks are pretty accepting of us in this type of setting. Thus, we can be more expressive and relaxed about who we really are!

Finally, our February session, "The Lady in Red", went exceptionally well!! The nice person mentioned above named Andrea came from Arkansas to do some still shots and interviews. They went exceptionally well. Also, just about everyone dressed in red. Several new members also came, and we welcome them to our club. Interestingly, there was a Blue Grass Music festival going on at the hotel, and most of us had to park in the "lower forty"?? Maybe some of you might recall that one year ago I attended StLGF for the first time and, sure enough, there was that same festival going on. I had to walk alone for about a quarter mile from where I had parked. This year, Babs was with me and we walked together. I wore slacks and canvas shoes...must've had a premonition or something. Anyway, once we got to the meeting, I went into the changing room and slipped into my new red dress and velvet pumps.

We almost didn't make this session, however. Our sweet little parakeet had had a nasty accident in our home at about 3:00 PM that day and didn't recover until 6:00PM. We had been told by an "expert" that she might not make it through the night, so we became pretty depressed. Nevertheless, our little bird, Princess, suddenly perked up and we both thanked God. Once at the meeting we shared this experience with others. Macie and Christy told me that vets can't do anything for parakeets?? Jordynne told us that Princess probably had become chilled from the trauma (she flew headlong into a window pane). Her fright resulted in this chilling effect which is normal. Now we know the symptoms and hope we don't have to treat her in the future.

One last thing. I was walking from the changing room to the Meeting room. A woman walked up behind me as I came through the double hallway doors. As she got up behind me she blurted out in response to the sign on the doors, "What's StLGF mean?" I turned and looked at her and said, "It stands for St. Louis Gender Foundation." She said, "Oh?" and then became somewhat cold. In retrospect, I wish I had handled it differently. I mean, I"m proud of our club, but, had I been thinking on my feet, I'd have said, "Oh, I'm not sure what StLGF means, but they are having something in the room just ahead, Honey. Maybe we could look in and see?" I mean, she thought I was a genetic woman and once we got to the doorway I could have invited her in, saying I'm a member. Oh well...

Until next adventure, Marci

Marci

Just How Trans Am I?

By Janet Lane

Ever find yourself wondering just how far you're going to take this little hobby of yours? Do you seem to be gliding over to the feminine side a little more every year?

For the answer to that question, take the following completely unscientific quiz, and at the end, I'll give you a totally meaningless answer.

1.On Monday nights, you like to:
A."Watch Monday Night Football with the hopes of seeing some bone-crushing hits."
B."Switch back and forth between the Home Shopping Club and football, with the hope of catching the cheerleaders in their darling outfits."
C."Watch my tape of Just Like a Woman while sewing sequins back onto my party dress."

2.While you are attending a business seminar in drab, a beautiful woman shows interest in you. You say:
A."You're a really interesting person. Where could we get a cup of coffee?"
B. "You're cute. Where could we get a drink?"
C."You're a doll. Where did you get that skirt?"

3.It will cost $250 to fix your brakes, and you have exactly that amount left in your checking account. You say to yourself:
A."I'm getting the brakes fixed immediately. Safety first."
B."If I fixed the brakes myself, I could spend the difference at Victoria's Secret."
C."I still have $250?!! I think I can coast to the Galleria."

4.Your wife recently asked you not to:
A.Wear her dresses and skirts without asking her first.
B.Wear her bras and panties without asking her first.
C.Have her clothes altered without asking her first.

5.You find that shopping for clothing with your spouse or girlfriend:
A."Bores the hell out of me. I'd rather be fishing."
B."Excites me. It's fun to share our love of feminine fashions."
C."Frustrates me. She poops out after only four or five hours."

6.If you recycled all the catalogs you receive in a year, you could probably save:
A.A small maple tree.
B.A 100-year-old oak.
C.The Mark Twain National Forest.

7.You hate to admit that you have become a little jealous of your boss because he:
A."Makes way more money than he deserves."
B."Is very smooth at playing office politics."
C."Would make a pretty good lookin' woman if he wanted to."

8. You begin to worry about your shopping when you find that you are spending more money on women's clothing than:
A.You spend on men's clothing.
B.You spend on the mortgage payment.
C.The Coast Guard spends on uniforms.

9.The telephone rings. It's probably:
A.A buddy, inviting you to go hunting with him.
B.A girlfriend, calling to gossip with you.
C.Your favorite sales clerk at Dillard's, calling to say she misses you.

10.You would not want your co-workers to know that you sometimes spend your lunch hour:
A.Having a drink at McGurk's.
B.Gambling at Casino St. Charles.
C.Practicing your feminine voice in your Buick.

11.Complete the following sentence: "If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we..."
A."Get peace in the Middle East?"
B."Find a cure for the common cold?"
C."Make a pair of nylons that doesn't run?"

12.While talking with an "800" operator at Frederick's of Hollywood, which of the following are you most likely to say:
A."Really, it's just a present for my wife."
B."I have a 33-inch waist. What's the waistline on that leather dress?"
C."What does it take to get you people to raise my credit limit?"

13.If you walked into your favorite bar dressed as a woman, which of the following would be most likely to happen?
A.Afraid of being recognized, you would have a quick drink in a quiet corner.
B.Afraid of being ignored, you would perch on a barstool, cross your legs, and smile sweetly.
C.Norm, Cliff, and the rest of the gang would shout in unison, "Trixie!"

14.At a holiday party, your spouse whispers that you should stop acting like such a know-it-all about the subject of:
A.Sports
B.Politics
C.Cosmetic surgery

15.While driving to work through heavy traffic, you see a young woman absent-mindedly putting on eye shadow while she drives. You roll down the window and yell:
A."Hey! Keep your eyes on the road!"
B."Hey! Why don't you pull over to do that!"
C."Hey! Blue eye shadow at the office is a big mistake!"

Scoring: Give yourself 1 point for each question you answered A, 2 points for each B, and 3 points for each C. Total your score.

15 to 20 points: You are excessively locked into a stereotypical male gender role. Get a massage and facial.

21 to 30 points: You are on speaking terms with your feminine side. You own a lip liner and know how to use it.

31 to 45: You are probably lying in a bubble bath right now, reading this quiz by the glow of scented candles.

Most of all, don"t let a silly survey tell you who you are. Find out for yourself.

RITA'S RAMBUNCTIOUS RAMBLINGS

by Rita Amore
Ghostwritten by Christy Kay

Miss Rita is taking a short and well earned sabbatical from her column. We'll see more of her wit and humor in the future.

In the mean time....It was a mere two years ago last month that I walked into our old meeting place where the StLGF met before to moving to our new Meeting Center. Someone later told me that I looked like a deer caught in the headlights of an on coming car, about to get run over. I did not appreciate when that was said to me the real truth in that statement. I met some of the truest friends and kindest people I've ever known that very first night. But that's enough about me.

January Meeting - Our January meeting was a bit different that anything I'd see done in my short history at StLGF. We invited Dr. Helen Friedman to attend and do a short question and answer period for first the Spouses group, and then the membership as a whole. Every one responded warmly to Dr. Friedman and asked very thought provoking questions. Once again, I was cheated out of my favorite attention getting question, (Is it OK to kiss on the first date?) as there was no need to break the ice. We got numerous emails and comments about the quality of Dr. Friedman's contributions, and the warmness she showed us. Dr. Friedman has already been asked to return at a future date, but it is as yet to be scheduled. Look for Dr. Friedman on the calender next year at the earliest.

The Follies - On February 21, the StLGF had it's 10th Annual Follies at Ernie's Class Act. No matter how much praise is bestowed upon Shannon for organizing and managing this event, she deserves vastly more. Since I had technical difficulties with my camera, (sorry, no photo layout this year) I had a chance to observe Shannon at work. I never realized how much effort it takes in getting all our performers on stage on time synched with the proper music on the PA. Thank-you Shannon, we all appreciate what you've done for us. And all our performers did a wonderful job. Thank-you all for particpating. Besides getting to watch Shannon orchestrate our group, I nearly got run down by Carmen Miranda (Jamie Edwards) as she was slightly behind in getting her cue. Don't worry, Jamie, I'm certain the bruises will heal before long. Rumor has it that the 10th Follies might be Carmen's swan song, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

February meeting.Once again we had our February meeting occurred during A Music Festival. When I got there early to open the rooms, I found a large crowd in the Lobby, with musicians playing in every nook and cranny imaginable. There were two bands in the Lobby at the base of the staircase, and several more in the hall that leads to our wing. Every place there was a place to sit, it seemed there were musicians sitting and picking. It really surprised me that Marci didn't run home and get her guitar and her Bobbie Sue outfit and join in. Inspite of the large crowd in the lobby, We had 3 new members present. Welcome.

Marci mentions that February last year was her first outing in her article, what Marci does not mention, and I will, is that she was so nervous, her hands were shaking so hard, that her drink was sloshing out of her glass. What a wonderful change a year makes. I look to see great things out of this lady in the future, and not just that she sings

Who Do YOU Think We Are? Andrea Cuchetto, who is collecting video, black and white still photos, and audio of transgendered people for a visual anthology of Transgendered People, entitled "Who Do YOU Think We Are?" Andrea's goal is to make her anthology available nationwide, to create a dialog with us and the nontransgendered community, and to facilitate learning and understanding. What we contribute is narrative and anecdotal information that shows we are real people, mothers or fathers, a brother, sister or neighbor, not a faceless unknown. From the response of the StLGF members, her goal is a shared one, with far more members than I anticipated participating. I did not get to listen to all of the interviews, but many of the one's I listened to were very moving. Andrea has a very empathic manner of interviewing, and coaxed heartfelt responses. If you are interested in participating in Andrea's project, let us know and we'll make certain that she knows. If we have enough interest, we might be able to coax her back for a another meeting.

Elections...A check of the StLGF calender shows that the Board Elections are coming up in April. If you wish to nominate someone, or would like to take part in shaping the 1998-1999 year for the StLGF, please do so. The 2 years I've been a part of the Board have been very rewarding personally.and lots of fun besides.

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