The StLGF is a non-profit, non-sexual, social and educational organization open to all adults who believe in freedom of gender expression. Although our members are primarily male-to female crossdressers and male-to-female transsexuals; all members of the transgendered community, as well as supportive family members and interested professionals.

"The Gazette" is published bi-monthly in January, March, May, July, September, and November. The deadline for submissions is the 15th of the month prior to publication. For information please use our voice mail number (314) 607-4163.

All submissions become the property of StLGF, and should be accompanied by a release-to-print statement. Letters, articles, and/or pictures that include nudity, profanity, or obscenities will not be published.

We also reserve the right not to publish any other materials that we consider inappropriate. All issues are copyrighted. However, any nonprofit organization or publication may reprint articles or other information from this publication, provided they allow the free use of their materials by other non-profit organizations.

If you have any questions please write:
StLGF,
PO Box, St. Louis, MO 63117,
or call us at
(314) 607-4163
Email the StLGF: stlgftg@netscape.net
Web Sites:
http://members.aol.com/stlgf1/

Email the Editor: Christy Kay: Christy Kay

The Presidents Column

by Carman M.

A Good Start..... Attendance at the last two events has been outstanding. In September we had approximately forty two (42) people in attendance. The preliminary count for October was forty three (43) people. Thank you all for coming out, supporting StLGF, and making our new members feel welcome.

Significant Other (SO) Support Group..... Taking care of our partners, significant others, and families is very important. I’m very pleased that we have had two well attended SO Support Group meetings so far this fall. I applaud all the wives and partners who have had the courage to come to our social gatherings and get to know us better. Thank you all for coming and participating in the SO Support Group. Whatever is talked about at the meetings is private, and I for one will never ask about what was said. Please let me and the other StLGF Board members know whether you find the support group meetings beneficial. Also, please let us know whether there is anything we can do to help facilitate or support the meetings.

Out of the Closet Night..... Our November 15th social gathering will give you an opportunity to clean out your closet. Please bring your too small, too large, out-of-style, and/or in-style clothing to our November gathering for a sale. You are also welcome to bring old wigs, jewelry, unopened make-up, and clean undergarments for the sale. All items will be marked with a nominal sale price and all proceeds will go to StLGF. Items which do not sell will be donated to the "St. Louis Effort for AIDS" charity. St. Louis Effort for AIDS runs a transgender friendly resale shop. If you have never gone there, please take time to check it out.

<Comments & Suggestions.... The StLGF Board is always interested in what we can do to support our members better. We will seriously consider any comments or suggestions you may have. Let us know what you like and dislike. Please feel free to provide comments and suggestions to either our E:Mail address (stlgftg@netscape.net) or the StLGF post office box. Thanks for your support and participation.We look forward to hearing from you. See you on November 15th....

The Continuing Adventures of Marci

By Marcia Lynn Williams

Hello to all you lovely Ladies and to all you S/Os out there in Femmeland! Well, as I promised in my last article, Babs and I took a special trip in late September to the Poconos in Pennsylvania. This particular journey was to the Paradise in the Poconos Getaway Weekend for cross dressers and their spouses/significant others. It is sponsored by Creative Design Services [tm] which is owned and operated by the very beautiful JoAnn Roberts and her spouse/partner Betty. All I can say at the outset is WOW!!!

We had planned this trip since last November. We set aside a certain amount of funds and gathered as much information as possible about the event. Our Hostesses JoAnn and Betty are so well organized that everything was taken care of in a most helpful and efficient manner. On the morning of Wednesday, September 17, 1997, we loaded our Camry, purchased gasoline, and headed East, making an overnight stop in Breeze Wood PA. The next day we arrived at the Pines Country Resort at about 2:00 PM. We checked in and went to our room where I proceeded to get out of my drab traveling clothes and put on a nice Jacklyn Smith original which included a lovely lined skirt, cream colored shell fitted jacket, and black velvet pumps. I made up my face and did my own do. Off we headed to the four o'clock Reception which included snacks and wine. So many lovely girls were there, all anxious for a most enjoyable weekend as our femme selves.

We had a nice dinner at 6:00 PM followed by leisure time at the clubhouse bar. Music was provided by a lovely cross dressed DJ and dancing ensued as we all became acquainted with one another. I had changed into a sexy little number with my now famous 5 inch white double strap heels! Unfortunately, Babs had taken ill several days before the trip and wasn't feeling her usual bubbly self. However, later in the weekend she came alive, so to speak, and we had the time of our lives together!!

Friday's activities included a leisurely brunch with a pleasant afternoon on the verandah. There were only 66 of us altogether, so there was a wonderful intimacy among us all. Oh, oh, a car just pulled up with a man and woman who wanted to dine at the resort. Hmmm...he's getting out of the car and walking past us with a very amazed look on his face. Meanwhile his female companion never once turned to make eye contact with the twenty or so girls lounging on the verandah?? Oh well...that evening we had a nice sit-down dinner followed by the Costume Party. I dressed as a...no, I'm wearing the same outfit for our October 25th Costume Party at StLGF, so I'll just surprise everyone. Suffice it to say that quite a number of us wore fishnet stockings including your truly! After the party was over, music and dancing again ruled the evening, so I just stayed in costume and got better acquainted with more girls and S/Os.

Saturday dawned with hopes high for the best Princess Promenade/Princess of the Poconos formal dinner that evening. This was to be followed by the Pocono Phollies, an amateur/professional talent show. During the day Babs and I went to brunch with me wearing a cute red tee, blue denim skort, black tights and red 5" sandals. After a scrumptious brunch (I had to constantly fight the urge to take second helpings. I've worked for over six months dropping nearly three waist sizes and I certainly didn't want to have to start from scratch again) I put on a pair of jeans and a pair of flats and off I headed with Babs, two other S/Os named Carol and Johnette, and Kim who is Johnette's cross dresser spouse. This was Kim's first time out into the everyday world, so she was pretty nervous. Moreover, she had never been out of the house dressed until the Getaway Weekend.

We went into town and into a liquor store so that she, Johnette and Carol could buy some wine coolers. While we five girls were at the check-out counter, a gentleman entered, bought some whiskey, then made the comment that we ladies must be in the Poconos for a Church Convention, what with all the alcohol we were purchasing! We giggled about it, then left and went to a beer store [they have separate beer stores in PA]. Outside there was this machine that sold fish bait (night crawlers). We all joked about someone thinking it was a sandwich machine and... We entered, shopped for a little while, then I bought some beer. It went smooth as silk. I picked up the package expressing in my femme voice how heavy it was, took it to the counter, smiled at the fellow at the check-out while another fellow ogled me and the other ladies, then I paid for my purchase, said, "Thank you." and we left, returning to the Resort. It was a really fun experience, and Kim was floating on a cloud for the rest of the weekend!! So was Marci!

Saturday evening was one of the best experiences Babs and I have ever had. We dined sumptuously on chicken cordon bleu and prime rib of beef, sipped fine wine, enjoyed luscious deserts, and awaited the Princess of the Poconos contest. Although I didn't win, I had a ball promenading up to the stage escorted by Cliff, a fellow who has a penchant for cross dressers. This was the second time I'd been escorted by a genetic male. The first, as you might recall, was at an ice cream shop in Collinsville IL. Andrew, you're such a good guy!! [wink] I did look stunning in my sequin gown, backseamed hose, big hair, and black patent pumps. All the girls looked so lovely.

After the Princess and her Court were chosen by us all, the Pocono Phollies commenced. All the acts were superb. And I dressed in a U.S. Postal Service knit shirt, pleated navy miniskirt, those seamed hose and the black patent pumps. I was a blonde Letter Carrier and did my standup routine followed by the "Cross Dresser Blues." I did the number acapella because I'd spent three months getting all ten of my nails so very long that I couldn't play Marty, my guitar. Actually, because of the setting, and my freedom to express a deep moodiness during the song, the whole routine went over extremely well. I got lots and lots of compliments! So, I'm passing those compliments on the all StLGF members whom I represented and who helped me develop my performing skills. Thanks to you all.

After the show, we again adjourned to the clubhouse for music, dancing and nightcaps. I strutted my feminine stuff down to our room, took off everything but my bra, slip, and hose, put on my 5" red sandals and my Frederick's of Hollywood sheer blue nylon robe with black lace trim. I felt so sexy as I strutted back to the bar and finished the evening off laughing and dancing. Never before have I been able to wear so many outfits in such a short period of time!! It was heaven!!!!

Sunday dawned with packing and dressing in drab. We all went to brunch at 11:00 AM, and as we met each other, looks of amazement as well as laughter filled the lobby of the resort. So many of us tried to figure out just who that girl was we partied with the previous evening was?? We ate and talked, sipped coffee, exchanged addresses both snail and e-mail, hugged, wiped tears from our eyes and headed home. Alas, our fun weekend was over and we had to go back into a world that just doesn't seem to want to understand what makes us tick.

So, there you have it. Another of Marci's adventures interacting with people and having fun. Hopefully, she and Babs can make it to at least one day of the Fall Harvest in Omaha NE over the Halloween weekend. Until next time... Marci

Marci

My Best Friend

By: By a Spouse

From the beginning of our relationship, I knew there was something different, something only a trustworthy person would find out about. when I'd go to his place, I'd find a bra (not my size), or a tube of lipstick (not my shade).

Another woman I thought!

But I never caught him in a lie, so when he told me about his crossdressing, it wasn't much of a shock. I wasn't sure how to handle this Revalation. The Other Woman was my Best Friend!

I have had my best friend for almost 26 years, and I have been married to mim/her for 22 of them.

I have never met her, I've only seen pictures of her. I am not certain I want to meet her! I may not approve. You see, she is a little trashy!

I try to give the support my best friend needs as he gives the support I need to me.

My Best Friend asks me why I did not marry someone normal or human?

What is normal or Human?

My best friend gave me a home and a famioly to show just how much I am loved.

The greatest thing about best friends is that you can be who and what you are! No matter what!

You are accepted.

The Continuing Episodes of Rhonda J

by Rhonda J.

After the long summer, missing the June meeting, not being able to make the picnic, what could go wrong for the September meeting?? Would you believe it? My granddaughter's birthday party was "rescheduled" to the same evening. Didn't leave the party till nearly 8:30 and had to come into the meeting about 9:30 in DRAB. Only Marci & Barb and Billie & Pam had seen me "that way". Marci challenged a few of the other's about who I was and nobody knew. (Made me feel like my transformation might be better than I realized.) Finally after getting dressed I was able to join in on the girl talk and have another grrreat time. Missed Billie and Pam who were on vacation but did get to see them a week or so before they left.

The StLGF is really a great group of people. Everybody is always soooo nice. Marci introduced me to Diane who had apparently joined us during my "summer of abstentia". Another neat gal. (There I go with that word again. Gives away my vintage. Just remember truly fine wine must be aged properly !!) Also met Shannon Ware and a few other "old timers". (Not because of age but because they've been around a while.) I long to spend more time with the super gals I've met this year. I regret not having found the StLGF long ago. It would have been wonderful to have had the support of all my new sisters when I was really struggling with who I am and the other issues we all face.

Got another "episode" to share. Remember my story about locking myself out of my hotel room, then having to get a key from the same desk clerk who checked me in?? Well the following episode is in the same class (First class??? Worst class???)

My daughter is getting married in two weeks and last Saturday, October 18th I went to my future son-in-law's bachelor party for a while then went home to get ready for the GF meeting. (My wife went to my daughter's bachelorette party and agreed to stay away from the house until after 8.) I was going to be late again so I used this opportunity to get partially ready at home. I did my make-up, padded my bottom and dressed from the waist down. I put on a flannel shirt and gathered everything

After arriving at the hotel for the meeting (barely a week early) I put on my bra, padding, etc. and a sweater. I didn't put on a wig because I had let my hair grow long enough to go wigless (at least among friends), and planned to tease and style my hair in the changing room. I "fluffed" my hair out a little then gabbed my purse and a small suitcase and headed to the Meeting Room.

Where were you!!!!!

As I approached the room I saw several 10 to 12 year old girls standing by the Meeting doors giggling like crazy. (And they hadn't even seen me yet!) I said "excuse me" (with my finest soft, southern accent) then approached the room. They told me it was locked and I thought they were peeking in and having fun at "our" expense. I knocked on the door but no one answered. About this time the girls started looking at me with strange expressions on their faces. (And a few giggles also.) An older gentleman (yes even older than me) approached me and asked if he could help. In the banquet room across the hall from the was a dinner meeting of some sort being set up. I think the sign at the door said Pastor's group or Pastor's party. (It was something with Pastor.) He led me to a phone and dialed the front desk for me. (He must have been an angel or something because he seemed to disappear after handing me the phone.) I asked the clerk at the front desk where the StLGF meeting was, inquired if the room had been changed, etc. (Would you believe, by now I was starting to get a little upset??)

After hanging up the phone one of the waitresses that serves at our meetings came into the room. (It was great to see someone I recognized.) We talked for a few minutes and she told me she had checked her calendar that morning and that our meeting was next week. She asked if she could do anything and offered to help. She's a super neat gal. And the real thing!! (Well I won't hold that against her. After all nobody's perfect.) I thanked her, said I thought I'd be OK then told her I'd see her next week.

By this time there was a fairly large group of people gathering in the hall waiting for the dinner buffet to open. I walked out the door and headed back down the hall. My "little friends" started a giggling contest. (Surely meant as a farewell song!) One of them hollered, "Hey, nice boobs!" I thanked her, smiled and told 'em all, "Bye-bye, maybe I'll see you again soon. (Thank God they liked my boobs, otherwise this might have been a harrowing experience.)

Why do these things happen to me. I must be blessed. Sure helps build character. By now I'm sure you have all heard enough from me. I do have another poem to share. Hope y'all like it. Until next time

Love and XXXXXXXX's,

Rhonda J

Random Thought's

by Jennifer Lane

Sugar and spice, And snakes and snails, Everything nice, And puppy-dog tails, That's what I'm made of... How about you?

After reading the entertaining and illuminating columns of Rita Amore, the Lovely One, I have been inspired to jot down some of my own random thoughts and observations. Although I still consider myself somewhat of a beginner at venturing in public as Jennifer, the editor has assured me that experience is not a requirement for contributing to the newsletter.

You have probably heard by now that Hullaballoo has closed its doors to the public. They will continue supplying movies and theater productions with their vintage clothing. (I hear they outfitted the Brady Bunch Movie. Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! ) However, there are still a bunch of used and vintage clothing stores scattered around town, for those of you who like the 50s or 60s look. The Resale Association of Greater St. Louis lists 23 shops in its brochure. Grand South Grand and the Delmar Loop have some fun stores, and I also like "Flair" at 1910 Cherokee in the Antique district. Unfortunately, many of the clothing labels do not show the size, so bring a tape measure or be prepared to try on lots of things...

The UPS strike has been settled. I was worried about Elise (now Morgan) for a while, as she has a black belt in catalog shopping. However, she seems to be cutting back on her purchases lately, leading to the bankruptcy of several fashion labels...

Everyone on television seems to be getting in on the crossdressing "craze." The latest was Rob Schneider, in the sitcom "Men Behaving Badly." He didn't look half bad as a girl, and reported that he had gotten a bikini wax because..."Helloooo! I'm wearing a thong..."

Watch for a made-for-TV movie on the life of Dennis Rodman. The "Worm" will not play himself, but will introduce parts of the movie...

Because the house I recently bought has only small closets, I needed to add some closet space for dresses, skirts, and other necessities. I talked with all the closet companies in town, and St. Louis Closet Co. impressed me the most. They did a good job and were pleasant and professional. The owner, Jennifer Quinn, says that, when she was in the sixth grade, she papered her closet with magazine covers, bought matching red plastic hangers, and totally organized her closet belongings. Wow! We should make her an honorary crossdresser...

As awful as the murder of Gianni Versace was, the resulting media coverage did give the world a glimpse into the cultures of Miami's South Beach and parts of San Diego, California. One article described Miami's South Beach as a place where straights, gays, lesbians, crossdressers, artists, musicians, designers, actors, and other professionals mingle without judging one another, and dance the night away together..

Where do you like to shop? Do you shop en femme or as your male self? Have you found particular sales clerks or stores that are especially helpful or understanding of our special needs? Or do you shop only from catalogs? If so, which ones? Send in your comments and opinions so we can share them in a future column!

I recently spent the afternoon shopping in Kansas City, dressed in drab (male clothes), and in each store I made a point of telling the salesgirls that the dress, shoes, or whatever, would be for me. Nobody batted an eye. In every case the reaction was the same: a friendly smile and "Would you like to try it on?"

After three years or so of going out as Jennifer, I can offer three basics that I think the new girls should consider when preparing for the terrifying yet exciting first step out the door: a good beard cover such as Dermablend and perhaps a little assistance with makeup, some hip pads such as those from Frederick's or Classic Curves to turn that male body shape into something a little more curvy, and a wig in a color and style that flatters your face (once again, you may want to get some assistance from someone like Jena - she's in the phone book). Also, if you're going to wear a tight dress, and you're not blessed with a flat tummy (and who is?), consider a waist cincher or a corset.

Just as important is your attitude. Nothing is more attractive than a warm smile and a friendly outlook. Put on a smile and try to leave it there for the entire evening. Let your feminine side shine through. When 1 walk out the door, I don't have the attitude that I'm trying to "fool" anyone, because I'm not faking anything. Yes, I'm doing what I can to look feminine, but underneath it all, Jennifer is very real.

Many books have been written about passing in public, and I recommend reading everything you can find. Here's one area that you might not have considered: the subtleties of eye contact. When I walk through a mall as a dude, I like to people-watch, and I make a lot of eye contact. As a female, however, I have to remind myself that meeting and holding a man's gaze for anything more than an instant can be interpreted as an invitation.

Compliments are like oxygen to a crossdresser. We all work so hard getting ready to go out, plucking, brushing, shaving, dabbing, lacing up, and choosing just the right outfit. A thoughtful word can give us a wonderful boost. And of course, if we want to get compliments, we should give them, too...

When you decide to go hit the mall while dressed, take a cue from genetic women and dress down. Women typically wear slacks or jeans and a top to go shopping. Wearing that cute dress of yours will get you a lot of attention, which you don't need if you're trying to blend in...

While doing research for a client this summer, I encountered the following:

"Years ago, psychologists attempted to cure crossdressers, but today most have recognized that crossdressing is lifelong and that they can obtain better results by teaching the crossdresser to accept his feminine side.
"One recent study found that typical crossdressers are virtually indistinguishable from non-crossdressing men in their personality traits, sexuality, and measures of psychological wellness... "

Actually, we differ in at least one important way. We can coordinate an outfit much better than the average male...

As I write these words, I'm preparing for the Fall Harvest, and by the time you read this, it will be a memory. I hope you attended and had a wonderful time. If you haven't been to a convention yet, I highly recommend them. They are a wonderful place for new girls to spread their wings, meet new friends, and learn a lot about makeup, clothes, hair, and more. It's a chance to dine, shop, dance, and simply live as a woman for three or four days at a time.

Many of us like to do our makeup before putting on a nice dress or blouse to keep from spilling makeup on the clothing. However, if the dress happens to be a pullover type, putting the dress on cleanly while wearing makeup can present a challenge. I solve the problem by putting a plastic dry-cleaning bag over my head, then pulling the dress on. If you try this, don't forget to pull the bag off quickly. I don't recommend this technique if you've had more than two drinks or you're trying to balance on spike heels.

Like the rest of the world, I was shocked and upset to hear of the death of Princess Diana. What I admired most about her was the fact that, despite all of the adversity and pain she had lived through, she kept her warmth and her genuine care for other people. She had the courage to tackle risky issues, such as when she comforted and hugged AIDS patients. She refused to give up her personality to be the kind of person the Royal Family wanted, and she was true to herself. She is an inspiration to me, and I know she will be remembered as a the Queen of Hearts.

Since the Front Page closed, we seem to have no "home" nightclub anymore, with the girls scattering to various locations such as the Grey Fox, Attitudes, Earnie's, Magnolia's, Mo-Ka-Be's, the Complex, and so forth. Wouldn't it be nice if we could somehow get together and start our own nightclub, a safe haven where we could gather on any weekend? Or perhaps we could choose one gender-friendly club as our "home" bar. What do you think?...

That's all for now, girls. By the way, you look adorable!

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